I am also questioning the sanity of doing something as physically exhausting as this race, two days after Josh's 1 year death anniversary. It is not only the expected tears on the day, but I have heard from other moms in my situation that the days leading up to the 1 year are even worse than the day of. This makes sense to me because even now I think, A year ago, he was alive and we were doing this, that and the other - totally oblivious to the impending doom. I liken it to being on a train, either reading, working or sleeping, and completely unaware that the track ahead is broken with an inevitable crash set to occur.
My memories of Josh are the most vivid during the few days before March 18th or "doomsday". So it stands to reason that these will be very difficult. All of us who knew Josh those last days have a moment or interaction that was the last time we saw him alive. Whatever day that was might be hard for you too. Maybe you will be like me and think, if I could only jump back in time, say something at the key moment, or do something that would stop the chain of events leading up to his fatal decision and suicide. And like me, you realize, there is nothing that can be done. All of the "would have, should have and could haves" will not reverse his tragic death.
So on the day of the race, hopefully I will find the energy needed to finish, for that, and not a specific time, is my goal. Lauren and her best friend and running partner, Eliza have decided to add more motivation by using the race as a fundraiser for Josh's Memorial fund. Below is the solicitation and information for the check, if you should wish to make a donation.
Dear Friends,On March 20th, 2010, we will lace up our running shoes and test our endurance as participants in the Sun Trust National Marathon in Washington, D.C. While two members of our team have entered to run the half marathon course and two plan to run the full marathon, each one of us do so for the same reason: to commemorate the life of Joshua Lee Anderson, one who is missed every day by his family and friends. We remember Josh as a cherished son, a cool little brother, a faithful friend and a natural athlete. And while nothing can bring this amazing boy back to us, we will remember and honor him by training for, and running in, the National Marathon.On March 18th, 2009, Josh tragically took his own life at the age of 17. A year later, we want to take this special opportunity to perpetuate his legacy and the education/prevention of teen suicide by asking family and friends to sponsor our team in this race. All contributions will go to the Josh Anderson Memorial Fund, held at the Great Falls Optimist Club in Great Falls, Virginia. Over the past year, Josh’s Fund has already raised almost $4,000 by way of generous donors.Through your sponsorship, it is our hope to contribute another $4,000 dollars to the Josh Anderson Memorial Fund to match what has already been collected. Any donation you give in support of our Marathon run, whether large or small, will go towards helping us meet this goal.With your support and Josh’s spirit cheering us on, we will find the strength to cross the race’s finish line.Sincerely,Lauren Anderson and Eliza Bailey (Marathon Runners)Sue Anderson and Susan Bailey (Half Marathon Runners)Please make your tax deductible check payable to: Great Falls Optimist Club with Josh Anderson Memorial Fund in the memo line. Mail checks to: Sue Anderson 1300 Carpers Farm Way Vienna, VA 22182.Please include a return address and an e-mail address – this is so we can send a recognition letter for tax deduction purposes.
Thank you and God Bless